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How Fostering Challenged My Relationships

There are many relationships that happen through being a foster parent. If I had to name them all, it would probably take up most of this blog. Then there are relationships with friends and family that were there before we became foster parents. When I became a foster parent in 2016, I heard about all the challenges with behaviors and all the challenges I would face in relation to the child coming into my home, but what I did not realize is the challenges it would add to my own relationships. Relationship with significant other It was about 6 months

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Importance of Positive Relationships for Our Mental Health

Relationships of all types have a direct effect on our day to day lives and emotions.  I’m sure you’ve experienced having a fight with your kiddo or teen, partner, family member, boss, etc. and it just put you in a bad mood…I know I have!  That’s because interactions and connections affect our mind and our body.  Positive vs Negative Talk I often find myself having a talk with my clients about positive and negative language.  Consider the social experiments schools had their students do a plant.  If not seen it, watch it here.  Definitely worth it!  The school took two

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Over Perceiving Threat, Under Perceiving Safety 

I walked through the grocery store jumping around from side to side sure that something was about to happen. When I turned the corner, I put my arms up ready to fight, as an 80-year-old woman who was no threat turned the corner and almost collided with me. Having just returned home from Afghanistan it was understandable that I was on guard, but what I didn’t know then was WHY?  Why was I walking around as if someone or something was about to harm me? Another time, a friend made a comment that made me feel insecure and BAM! There

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How Our Bodies Store Trauma

We now have more scientific evidence than ever showing the relationship between the mind and body. Most of us understand how diet can influence mental health (example: giving a child a sugary snack before bedtime). However, we also need to understand the very real physical effects of psychological stress and trauma on the body, particularly with trauma that hasn’t been fully processed or even acknowledged by the person who experienced it. Unprocessed trauma may get “stored” or “stuck” –not just in our subconscious mind and memory–but throughout our physical being. Trauma is Trauma: Big or Small Most of us will experience some

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Healing Trauma- Part 2

If you recall, in my last blog I talked through the definition of trauma and how trauma can get stored in the body.  Trauma leaves an impact long after it’s over.  Chronically freezing, trying to escape, fighting, or collapsing.  But why? Why do our bodies get caught like this? How We Get Stuck Well, there are few explanations for this: Time Stamping: Our central nervous system (made up of our brain stem and spinal cord) is terrible at time stamping.  A lot of people ask me to define “time stamping,” which makes sense.  It’s not a common term.  Time stamping

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